The Great White Buffalo (in a soft whisper)

There’s a point in everyone’s life when they wish they had some sort of time machine to help them take a second chance at caging their great white buffalo (in a soft whisper). Well, to be honest, that whole sentence does not make sense to me anymore. For one, time travel to the past is now considered impossible by the great Stephen Hawking and for two; the great white buffalo only exists relative to unfavorable situations. Let me explain.

I downloaded the time travel episode of Stephen Hawking’s Into the Universe series to discover that time travel to the past is quite impossible. Let’s face it, to go back in time and change our lives would make no sense because there would be two of us existing at the same time, the present us (or future us, however you want to look at it) and the past us. Imagine, if you will, a man passing through a time machine with a mission to kill himself. He goes back in time 10 minutes and ambushes his past self as that past self is on his way to the time machine (to go back in time to kill himself). If it could be true, then that ambush would have already happen, which means that the man would have been dead before he could even travel back in time….to kill himself!!! Think about it! It creates a paradox does it not? How can you kill yourself if you’d already be dead before you could do so because your future self has already done it?? So you see, time travel to the past cannot exist. And neither does the great white buffalo (in a soft whisper).

The great white buffalo (in a soft whisper) is the one that got away. You know, the girl/guy that was so good for you that even 5 years down the road you’re still regretting not fighting to stay in a relationship with them? If you are nodding your head yes to that it means that your life is shit right now. Well, according to me that’s what it means. It’s kind of like what happened today. I was walking to my truck after work when out of nowhere it began to rain, hard. Naturally, I started looking for trees with stretched branches that filters the raindrops into drizzle to walk under. As I hopped and skipped from tree to tree I noticed a man in a t-shirt and shorts, casually taking his time walking. Drenched of course.

“Hey man!” I called out through the chaos of rain contacting the earth, “you do realize it’s raining right?”

He’s startled. “Oh hi there fella. Yeah, I know it’s raining. I lived in Vancouver for most of my life so this rain doesn’t bother me much.” And continues his stroll down the sidewalk.

What is rain but tiny drops of water? What’s the worst that could happen? I get wet and eventually dry off. Before that encounter, a sunny day was the only thing that I could think of. And on the hottest days, all I could think of was the refreshing fall breeze. And when my heart is aching because of a horrible girlfriend, all I can think of is the girl that treated me better. But does that mean she’s the great white buffalo? Is she the one that got away? I mean, would she still be the great white buffalo if I were with a girl that appreciated me? I doubt it.

So, my friends, I tell you this. Everything is relative. Just because the girl you were with for 4 months has a million dollar laugh, has the decency to unlock your door for you from inside your truck, and held you like no other, doesn’t mean she’s the only one who can do it. Don’t get me wrong, if you ever find someone like that, you best know that they’re keepers. But if they do leave you hanging in a dark hotel room with nothing but the silent tides of a beautiful lake mocking you, know that you’ll get a chance to be happy again. And yes, maybe later down the road you’ll find one another again, but for your own sake, don’t count on it and find someone who will appreciate you. Because even though Back to the Future 1,2, and 3 were great movies, don’t count on a time machine to get that…

...Great White Buffalo (in a soft whisper).

*note, I wrote this after watching Hot Tub Time Machine for the second time. The first time was in the movie theatre with my ex. I couldn’t help but go back to that night as I watched the movie on DVD in my room, reminiscing the days when I could just lean over and steal a kiss whenever I wanted. And then I realized that I could never have that again. Not with her, unless I had a time machine. And the rest is history I guess.